GW: Powdered Wig, That is

We sat down with the former commander in chief at his home in Mount Vernon, Virginia for a casual conversation about the upcoming inauguration of Barack Obama.

“So will you be watching the inauguration, Mr. President?”

“No, I won’t, I’ve got some soybean fields to inspect, and frankly, this television thing gives me a headache no matter what is on. Mr. Franklin says it’s something to do with electromagnetic frequency disturbing the body’s nervous system.”

“With all due respect Mr. President, this is a most historic event in our nation’s…”

“You’re telling me about historic? Don’t make me get all Al Pacino on you here, but I’ve been reading this book on how there was an alliance between the CIA and the Mafia that led to JFK’s assassination. I didn’t hear any of the candidates talk about that during the campaign!”

“Well sir, that was 45 years ago and…”

“And apparently a great majority of the American public do not believe the official version of what happened! How can a republic go forward with integrity if substantial questions regarding the assassination of their president go unanswered?”

“Sir, we didn’t really intend to diverge into a discussion of…”

“Of what really matters? Mr. Hamilton tells me he looked at your books and it seems you’re in quite a cowpie of a financial disaster, but this inauguration will be the most expensive in history?”

“Don’t you think it’s because the people need…”

“Need what? Spectacle? Entertainment? How about some substance? I didn’t have any poets or marching bands and seems my administration went ok.”

“It was a different time. Slavery was legal for God’s sake!”

“Oh here we go, wondered when that was coming. Well it’s not legal anymore is it? I apologize for my temper, I’ve got to go for a horseback ride and cool off, let’s resume later.”

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