Palin Unclear About Duties as Top Model Judge: Upset Powers Not Influential in U.S. Senate

In remarks at the governor’s weekly press conference (held earlier today), Palin bemoaned the lack of authority conferred upon Top Model judges.

“I mean, c’mon, why can’t Tyra allow her judges the gosh darned opportunity to break tied votes in the U.S. Senate?” the Alaskan governor asked.

An aide, standing near, immediately placed his hand over the governor’s mike and whispered in her ear.

“The Consti-what?” Mrs. Palin remarked. “Anywho, why can’t a Top Model judge declare war? Approve treaties with sovereign nations? Confirm cabinet appointments?”

Tyra Banks could not be reached for comment, though the possibility looms large that the model-emcee-producer used false promises of power to lure the unsuspecting, ratings-pumping Palin onto the aging show.

Show regular Miss J., ‘runway diva extrordinare’ and flamboyant lipstick-wearing black man, expressed stereotypical effeminate disapproval over Palin’s spot on the fashion tribunal.

“ ‘Miss Thang’ struts into rehearsal the other day and turns it upside down. Uh-huuumm. She just walks in with some forsaken red suit, and those pumps, oh those pumps! Horrible. Horrible! She looked like a broke dog at a condemned kennel, although I love a girl with broke down chicken legs and helium-balloon hair,” J. concluded with an eye roll and a finger snap.

Palin is no stranger to televised controversy. Last season’s guest judge appearance on Project Runway raised eyebrows after the governor cast a vote for a design showcasing a pitbull with lipstick.